On Conduct

As I was working today a was inspired to think about something that I haven´t thought about in a long time, taking a lap. As the students at the school went through a band lesson, besides the obviously 1970s chest piece xylophones which I found pretty sweet, I noticed something else...When the kids would talk out of turn, or continue to play their instruments once the almighty hand of silence was raised, they would be taught a lesson about their behavior by having to take a lap around the basketball court. Then it hit me, what ever happened to taking a lap?

Yes, I´m sure this is still a widely used mechanism in elementary schools and sports programs everywhere, and to it´s credit I believe is one of the best attitude and behavior conditioning tools around*. But why does it stop getting used? It´s funny how as adults we think we´re so smart and above all these ¨childish¨mechanisms, but upon closer inspection since we´ve abonded them we tend to be the ones with most the problems.

In Practice:

As a young baseball player that liked to watch the girls tennis team jump rope instead of practicing sliding drills I have taken more than a few laps in my day, and in any other situation I´m sure I would have learned my lesson to focus and stay on task. In all seriousness though, if my memory serves me, in every other instance: from talking back, to listening to instructions, to making sure to not get caught skipping class during sports season again...all were guidelines followed and lessons learned under the penalty of having to take a lap.

I guess the beauty of it goes far beyond just having to do the running (I still hated laps even though I was a cross country runner. I guess it just goes to show no matter what, running is a punishment). This time usually anywhere from a half minute to close to five minutes is usually enough to think about what you did wrong and what ways you can avoid doing that again. And if you screw up again, which people are prone to do, you continue to run laps until you have figured it out, and your behavior has been effectively conditioned. There are also times when you don´t even have to do the running to learn the lesson. Say someone takes five laps for making fart noises with their armpit during sustained silent reading (SSR), I´ll put good money on the fact that everyone else has learned the lesson to not repeat that behavior too! Also, let´s not forget that the social factor of being made spectacle in front of everyone and their ever judging eyes is the clinching factor to make you never want to do it again. Regardless of how tough people want to sound by saying I don´t care what people think, being made an example in front of peers is not on anyones top ten list.

In Theory:

To have a system where everyone would be subject to taking a lap not only to correct their behavior but to think about how to correct it? Genius! Managers have been dreaming about such a procedure for years. And with all the crazy things that have been tried over the years this idea isn´t that far out of the box.

Oh, the lenghts I wouldn´t go to put taking a lap into the by-laws of board of directors and committee meetings of almost every organization I have been part of. That person who has something personal, off task, or outright disruptive to add to every agenda point, no longer disruptive because they´re busy taking laps. Late for a meeting, take a lap. Didn´t finish your report, or get to the assignment you chose to take on, take a lap.

And not even just in business, how great it would be to see adults everywhere taking laps for forgetting the milk at the store, or to pick up the kids on time. I´d want to see extra laps for spending the rent money at the bar or at the card table. Imagine yourself hearing this from a police officer, ¨Sir you were speeding/not wearing your seatbelt/talking on your cell phone, etc. but I´m gonna let this go as a warning as soon as you get done taking a lap¨. Hell if it saves me 100 bucks I´m into it.

This could possibly even be therapeutic for customers who have received poor service. To be told by a manager they were sorry for the rudeness of their employee, but that person is taking a lap...Yeah, I´m good with that. To get to watch your waiter take a lap after forgetting the extra ranch you ordered for you salad or fries...Makes me feel better. And let´s not forget about the exercise that these employees are getting, talk about a way to keep your employees in shape.

In Reality:

To be honest, I condone this because I too have needed a lap on more than a few occassions, and could have benefited from the practice. I will also put money down that if my last boss, who is a follower of this blog, is reading this he is full on shaking his head in agreement right now. I can remember several occassions where we talked about ways to keep the tempo up, or find a word cue to use when we would come to an impass of idea as to not get bogged down, or when I let my attidude at work be colored by my personal life, etc. When all other ideas failed, taking a lap probably would have worked.

Also in my personal life, I have this misconception that being honest doesn´t need censorship, and I tend to be annoying by constantly correcting people (not to mention coming across as a know it all). Further I constantly misrepresent myself by being overly blunt or callous (not to mention I´m notorious for taking things that one step too far) about an issue, which continuously hurts peoples feelings, or leads them to be offended or believe that I don´t like them. I am more than aware of this, but never seem to learn my lesson that people generally don´t want to hear the word ¨actually¨ before everything that comes out of your mouth, or be told that using the word W.O.W. to make fun of World of Warcraft players makes you a dork too for knowing the acronym and possibly worse since you´re falsely trying to act like youre above it. This is just a taste, I could literally go on for hours about circumstances I constantly find myself in and the behaviors that I´d like to change. What if my buddies would just call me out when being a jerk, and simply say, ¨Come on Chris, you´re better than that, TAKE A LAP!¨

In Rebuttal:

I guess an argument would be to question why a person just can´t be their own self administrator of checking their baggage, fixing their problems, staying on task, or watching what they say. Should it be that hard for a responsible adult to do these things? Yeah emotions can sometimes supercede peoples better judgement, but a mature person can learn from their mistakes and make sure they don´t repeat the same mistake more than a few times at most. Sure, routine can lead to comfortability which can lead to indiffernce at times, but usually people snap out of it, and correct their behavior.

In Response:

Yes, it is that hard for people to do those things themselves, when peoples emotions are involved all bets are off. Mature or not, more often than not people are their own worst enemies and repeat the same mistakes over and over without fail. And yes, people do snap out of it, but usually after it´s already too late. I would think that a person who seriously believes this argument doesn´t hang around alot of people, or pay attention to their behavior. Or in other words, to put a new spin on an old joke...¨John Lennon called, he wants his idealism back¨.**

In Conclusion:

Maybe you too can think of an instance or two where simply taking a lap could save the day. It´s literally all around us. Or maybe you don´t like the argument against, and have a better one, I welcome your thoughts.


In Reference:

*To my discontent, since I went to school and enacted as I was in H.S. and soon after I graduated, a movement of not wanting to continue practices like cutting kids from sports, or not giving letter grades in order to not hurt a childs fragile ego was introduced into U.S. schools. It is possible that taking laps was one of these archaic, life shattering practices that had to go. If that is the case I am officially deeply saddened.

**Sorry to all the ¨Dreamers¨and Nic Wiese (the biggest Lennon fan I know) for having to go there. If you must, blame David Spade for teaching me that medium.