Only in AMer..Guatemala

So I tried to go to the movies. Made a trip down to old Chimaltenango, I have learned that you need to add the tenango part "means town or city" to the root word because it is very very similar to a word that is part of George Carlin's big seven. Anyway it was somewhat of a momentous occassion because I went by myself. I figure I have to learn sometime, and at the age of 28 I get frustrated at the fact that I have to use training wheels for a lot of things down here.

So anyway I get to Chimaltenango and I weigh myself on one of the cool machines (lets be honest it's a scale) that they have in the mall for everyone to get their weight. And low and behold I a have lost 50lbs. I have to admit that I think that's alot, especially for 7 weeks. If anyone has questioned my description of the food and the amount or lack there of...I issue this as my proof, that I really miss food. Anyway I go to see what movies are playing...Karate Kid and the Origen.

This is funny for me because I have stated several times that I would NOT be seeing the Karate Kid. First of all I have already seen the Karate Kid. It had three very important things. Pat Morita, Elizabeth Shue, and of course a very Tiger Beat friendly Ralph Machio. For me, if a movie does not have at the very least, these three things...It CANNOT be titled the Karate Kid. Much the same way any show or movie without Leornard Neimoy, Bill Shatner, or an in the closet George Tekai cannot be called Star Trek. You will remember the Next Generation was the name given to the second wave*. Turns out the only movie with subtitles was Karate Kid. Turns out that a gentleman, the same that I discussed Dirty Dancing with** had seen the real Karate Kid when it came out in 1987 during his senior year of high school and originally felt the same way I did, but had informed me that he went with his son and that it was pretty good, and a completely different movie.

With this information I decided that I could handle it. I went and asked the gentleman at the window one last time to buy a ticket and make sure that the movie had subtitles. It did he confirmed, BUT and that's a big BUT, for some unknown reason to anyone, except the hearing impared population of Chimaltenango both the language and the subtitles, were in Spanish. So suffice it to say, I did not go to the movies or watch the Karate Kid.

Instead I went and walked around the downtown shopping district. I found a gentleman that said he would make me a pair of Snake skin boots for about 80 bucks, same for Emu, which are about $400 bucks a pair in the U.S. So for this I was thankful, and after an afternoon of windowshopping rode the 80 person deep chicken bus back to Patzun.


*I do realize that there was a movie a year or two ago, but it just goes to show the lack of respect that hollywood has for people that can still remember the original. You didn't see this happen with Saved By the Bell. Even though the cast was the same they changed the name to the College Years when they were'nt in High School anymore, and further to The New Class when they went for the nostalgic remake.

**For those that didn't know the movie I referenced in my last post was Dirty Dancing. I can only hope that The Swayze and that sweet prince Chris Farley are somewhere working on Chipindales routines as I type.